My phone chirps. At first, I don't pay attention because all of my settings are set to sound the same. It could be email or a facebook notification. But it isn't. I look down casually at my phone and see the following message...
"Tomorrow I sign my divorce decree."
It is the Boss. It has been awhile since I have heard from him and instantly I feel my heart start to race. I am beyond excited for him.
I worked for the Boss for a year before I met his wife. I had heard stories about her from the other men at work. If you think men don't gossip at work, you are mistaken. She was insanely jealous and cruel. She had a very suspect background (including some jail time) and honestly, I wanted no part of her. I avoided talking about anything non-work related to him for a very long time. There were examples of her irrational behavior over the years. She pouted during a company party claiming he was flirting with another man's wife when he never even spoke with her. He received calls from her at least five times a day. It was strange behavior to me. Then...
She cheated.
She left him and their children and moved in with someone else. It was at this time, I became a friend to the boss. I became a shoulder to cry on and a sounding board for his frustration. I felt myself developing a crush on him and I am fairly certain he felt the same but we never acted on it. Yet.
After months of this he took her back. Everyone told him he was crazy. His mother stopped speaking to him. His business partner told him it was a mistake. I was crushed, but I was supportive. I admit, I was beginning to have all of the silly fantasies that he would run off with me and we would live happily ever after... I knew it was silly but still, when he took her back and forgave her, it made me like him more. What a great guy! (I know, it makes no sense) Then it happened. He told me he wanted an affair with me. He was blunt, honest, and let me know that it was just sex and no long term relationship. And so it began...
"I hope you will celebrate with me."
I know what that means. He knows I will. You see, there is a crazy physical attraction between us. We laugh about it but it is true. After the company sold, we met a few more times then it happened. His wife looked at the phone bill. There were hundreds of texts between us. My number appeared over and over and she knew. She took the print out straight to my husband. At work. I was sick to my stomach and I knew my life was coming to an end. It didn't. By this time, my husband had heard all of the stories about her behavior as well. She started sending me texts saying things like "You can have him, he is your's now."
I denied everything. She had no real proof, she only knew we liked to text. It was too late though. She was certain and they were over. I was terrified she would show up at my new job or my house. I was so thankful we don't live in the same town. I changed my number, fixed things at home, and stopped talking to the Boss. For a little while anyway.
I tell him to enjoy the moment and he tells me "I will but not as much as I enjoy you." I know this statement is true because I am a sure thing for him. No need for flattery with me anymore. It comes from him so sparingly that I am always taken by surprise when I hear it. It is usually about how much he wants me or needs me.
I could have handled things so much better. There are many mistakes we both made along the way and many opportunities to learn from my first affair. The Boss has taught me many things...trust my instincts, keep my emotions out of my affairs, and the most important being... never underestimate a crazy wife.
3 comments:
I just came across your writing and I completely enjoy what you write. For me, the attitude...i.e. you, of the educated, confident woman is SO important. You have the wonderful combination of "guy-like" observations coupled with a "matter-of-factness." Very enjoyable. But may I apologize for my fellow cheaters whom you've chronicled so well...you have had the misfortune to come across a steady stream of absolute train wrecks...sometimes I think it embarrassing to be a man...seriously. Don't give up on us. Some of us are the real deal as many of your new readership will likely convince you. Keep up the good work. JB
You are very kind. I truly laughed out (and startled my dogs) when I read your apology for my "steady stream of absolute train wrecks." It is true and I am not sure what I am doing wrong. This experience (the blog) has been an amazing release for me. I am able to say things I can't say to friends and get some honest feedback. I will continue on and hopefully not disappoint you.
Thanks for your response. I sincerely doubt you are doing anything wrong...it sounds like you genuinely look for the best in friends and give them the benefit of the doubt. That is a great trait to have even if it does leave you frustrated at times. As for the blog, I'm sure it is a wonderful release because it is an exceptionally incestuous community as I'm sure you will find...and a tremendous way to get laid...all the best.
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